Insulted

By Posted on 6 Comments 2 min read

I have just been insulted in the street and I never realised! I have been out for a short stroll, taking advantage of the rare summer sun and collecting some much needed vitamin D. Along the way, I bumped into a lady who knew my parents from years ago. She must be in her late 90’s now and I wasn’t sure if she’d remember me, but, alas, she did!

I don’t want to reveal her real name, so I’ll call her what I’ve always known her as, Mrs Grumpyfart. Growing up, I recall she was a cantankerous old curmudgeon, always moaning about the price of things and how nothing was ever as good as it was back in her day. She used to look me in the eye and say, ‘Children should be seen and not heard..’ and when it was time to for her to leave would insist on giving me a kiss and a hug! She always had this strange smell of ‘cat’ about her, and it would stay with me for days after.

The first thing I thought when we just met was ‘I hope she doesn’t give me a kiss and a hug’, especially with all that beard growth and the lipstick that seemed to be everywhere but on her lips. Anyway, we chatted about old times and how she would visit us most Sundays in the family home. This is when she insulted me without me having a clue. She said, ‘Your father was a very good looking man, tall dark and handsome…….. you’re like your mother!!!’ I never batted an eyelid. We carried on talking for a few minutes more and then parted, thankfully without the close encounters.

It wasn’t until I got home and regurgitated the conversation that we had that I realised what she had said. Mrs Grumpyfart was in my life ever since I was born, so I know what she is like, and I know she knew exactly what she was saying when that insult came flying from her mouth. There’s truth in that old saying, ‘The Good Die Young’.

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6 Comments
  • lbeth1950
    June 3, 2016

    Thanks. I laughed out loud. A saintly old hellion lived in our neighborhood, too! I never heard a kind word from her lips, but she never missed church.

    • admin
      June 3, 2016

      Thank you, Beth. I’m glad to know I’m not alone in that I have them living by me. 🙂

  • jacquelineobyikocha
    June 6, 2016

    Thank you for an early morning chuckle. I know her type 🙂

    • admin
      June 6, 2016

      Thank you, Jacqueline. There must be plenty of her sorts about.

  • Leland Olson Hoel
    June 22, 2016

    Thank you Trev, that was very entertaining. I need chuckle every now and then, topped of with an outburst of laughter. That was a good one. I believe people like that are evenly scattered around the globe. They are strategically placed to keep the masses on their toes actually. The insults usually come between stories about their physical conditions at the time or 40 years ago, whichever it is does not matter to me anymore. I carry a hearing aid shut off in my pocket, then mostly nod and smile.

    • admin
      June 23, 2016

      Thank you, Leland, I’m glad it brightened your day. Thanks.

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